The reason I refer to the three step social reward as "celebrating," rather than "praising," is because it focuses more on developing emotional relating skills, than task performance skills. Since the reward process is "reciprocal", with both parties actively rewarding (celebrating) each other, the essence is on sharing a pleasurable mome...nt, via "emotion sharing." By giving ten (physical), thumbs up! (gesture) and declarative statement "We rock!", "We did it!", etc., the focus is on "doing it together" and "sharing the moment." Affect is the glue that gives strong episodic memory to the celebrating. It teaches the child to (1) feel safe sharing emotion with you, (2) feel connected (emotionally attached) to you, and (3) learn how to reciprocate (share, co-regulate) interaction together.
To augment the social/emotional learning of the Three Step Social Reward, try these guidelines.
1. Get face to face, at eye level, when celebrating! You want your face to be easy to reference. When giving ten and thumbs up (& knuckles), bring your hands up close to your face, so the child is referencing your facial expression when celebrating.
2. Use less words, and more nonverbal communication (animated facial expressions, exaggerated gestures, and excited vocalizations). Use words only in short declaratives "Awesome", "We rock!", etc.
3. Focus on "we", rather than "you". Take the focus off "how well he did" and celebrate "doing it together", "sharing the experience!" This reduces task performance anxiety and draws attention to "relating" and celebrating "companionship."
Using the three step social reward not only reinforces the task performance skills you are teaching, but builds strong social and emotional skills in emotion sharing! It is learning through relating! Have fun! Share the moment!
To augment the social/emotional learning of the Three Step Social Reward, try these guidelines.
1. Get face to face, at eye level, when celebrating! You want your face to be easy to reference. When giving ten and thumbs up (& knuckles), bring your hands up close to your face, so the child is referencing your facial expression when celebrating.
2. Use less words, and more nonverbal communication (animated facial expressions, exaggerated gestures, and excited vocalizations). Use words only in short declaratives "Awesome", "We rock!", etc.
3. Focus on "we", rather than "you". Take the focus off "how well he did" and celebrate "doing it together", "sharing the experience!" This reduces task performance anxiety and draws attention to "relating" and celebrating "companionship."
Using the three step social reward not only reinforces the task performance skills you are teaching, but builds strong social and emotional skills in emotion sharing! It is learning through relating! Have fun! Share the moment!
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